Reid Reynolds reports on "Relocating Late in Life"

3/3/23

There must be hundreds of relocation stories for our far-flung class. Most of us probably figured out where we wanted to spend this chapter of our lives years ago. Not me. Last October Pam and I made another scouting trip to Philadelphia in search of our next stop. This wasn’t a spur of the moment trip. Three years ago we paid a visit to my recently re-located daughter, Lily, and now son-in-law, César. Before we left Lily said, “Why don’t you move here to be closer to us?” That was an intriguing surprise. Here's how it has played out, so far.

Retiring to the Philadelphia area was not a totally foreign concept for me. In 1986 my parents sold their Chappaqua home and moved to Crosslands continuing care retirement community in Kennett Square, PA, about 30 miles from Philly. (Their Chappaqua friend Mary Nash had been the trail blazer.) Crosslands had been a good place for them to spend their final years so it might work for us. On subsequent visits we toured various retirement communities and looked at high-rise condos and townhomes in Center City. By the time of our October trip our mission was to select the most suitable retirement community. But the more we thought about it we realized we are more urbanites than suburban retirement community people. We took another look at townhomes and found one we liked, just 3 blocks from Independence Hall and 15 blocks from Lily and César. We made an offer that was accepted and returned home to put our Denver house on the market. A realtor friend had long assured us that spring was the best time to sell our home with its nice garden. Nevertheless, he said, “Your house is ready to show. I can put it on MLS on Thursday, and I’ll organize an open house for Friday evening for neighbors and realtors.” About 30 people, mostly from the neighborhood, showed up, had some wine and cheese and said nice things about the house, especially Pam’s art collection. Twenty-four hours later we had a full price offer, and the relocation marathon began.

Lesson #1. We’re too old for marathons. Woke for octogenarians is downsizing. A life-long procrastinator and packrat, I got a D- in downsizing. While I donated about 10 boxes of books to the library and 2 boxes of tools to Habitat for Humanity, I have held on to books I will never read again, LPs I may not listen to and silk ties I will never wear. Fortunately, our new home includes an ample study for me and my books, papers and music (most still in boxes) and a full basement for the overflow. Getting all this stuff ready for the movers or the dump was the first leg of the marathon. (We had some nice goodbye events with neighbors and the Colorado contingent of HGHS ’60.)

The mid-January drive from Denver to Philly went fairly well (dry pavement all the way). However, a mismatch in closing dates had us cooling our heals in a hotel near our new home for a week. Physically restful but psychologically stressful. 

At 6:30 a.m. the day after our closing the moving van pulled up in front of our new house and the chaos began. Three strong guys plopped everything down, mostly in the right room on the right level (3 stories plus basement). The next morning we began the toughest leg of the marathon, unpacking. 

• “Let’s just put this here for the time being and we’ll find a permanent place later.” (6 weeks later we’re still in the time being!) 

• “But this box was market ‘fragile’”… as pieces of broken glass tumbled to the floor. 

• My old Scandinavian Design desk, table and bookcases require extensive repairs (now completed) to be functional.

• Several plastic parts on my $1,000 X-Chair are busted. (After multiple phone calls and Google searches someone suggests I file a warranty claim. The chair is a total loss due to mover negligence, not manufacturer defects. Nevertheless, three days later a brand-new replacement chair is delivered!) (We declined a few thousand dollars of moving insurance thinking, wrongly, that our homeowner’s policy would cover losses during the move. Don’t make this mistake.)

The settling-in leg of the marathon: It shouldn’t be a surprise that settling-in to a new home in a new city has some surprises and challenges. Twenty-first century surprises and challenges can be especially challenging at this stage of life.

• Getting connected. We thought transferring our Comcast account from Denver to Philly would be a breeze. Just plug in the modem and connect the cable box. During our first two weeks we made at least a half dozen visits to the local Xfinity store to address one issue or another. It has taken two separate technician visits to get our “smart TV” working. In Denver I would often watch only one or two hours of TV a week. I’d been looking forward to spending more of my 80s watching all the great stuff that’s available. It’s depressing to acknowledge my limited TV watching skills and to contemplate the hours of trial and error it may take to be able to navigate the world of TV like a high schooler with SATs around 350.

• A new life in a new city requires learning about new websites (e.g., health care), apps and dozens of new passwords. Too much time cursing at my devices when I should be exploring my new neighborhood.

• One of the attractions of our new house is the modern appliances and HVAC systems. The Thermador oven, microwave, dishwasher and fridge all have touchscreens with a dozen settings for washing dishes and twice that number for warming something in the microwave. It took over a week to figure out how to access the controls on the recessed vent over the range. Slowly but surely, I’m finding the few settings I need on each device.

Lesson #2: Maybe we’re not too old. Has it been worth it? Believe it or not, YES. 

• Both Lily and César have demanding jobs and active social lives. (César is an assistant professor in the School of Medicine at Penn where he heads a lab with 20 grad students and post-docs, chases grant money to support the lab and travels in the U.S. and Europe making presentations about his research; Lily just got promoted to an important job in city government related to the new federal infrastructure money coming into the city and state.) Nevertheless, we’ve had several wonderful meals and hikes with them. Now, if only there was a grandchild…

• I’m a classical music fan and it’s a short 10 block walk to the Kimmel Center where I can hear the great Philadelphia Orchestra and many world-class musicians.

• Each morning the Open Snow app on my phone reminds me of what a great ski season Colorado is having, but living in Philly will give me an opportunity to become reacquainted with the Northeast, especially the rural areas of Pennsylvania, New York and New England where I developed my passion for the outdoors.

• I had lunch yesterday with a long-lost college classmate. We still enjoy each other’s company. Developing a social network in a new city is still a work in progress.

If there’s an HGHS ’60 in the area, let me know. 

Ed. note - Reid was kind enough to send a pic with one of the local attractions in his new locale.  I checked out the national parks website about the Liberty Bell, an it turns out that most of what I "knew" about it was not true.  Facts can be such stubborn things.  Anyway, I found the site to be full of lots of interesting things about the bell, and if you are interested take a look right HERE

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